Vending machine

[Freddino18]

You get a cool Spongebob ice cream bar

I insert a bad timing belt

[somitomi]

Aw shucks, the machine can't give you pants right now, maybe come back later?

I insert rubberized casters

[Freddino18]

You get felt floor slides

I insert a small load of laundry

[ratammer]

You get cleaned clothes, but not the ones you put in. Actually, I think they're mine.

I insert a microphone.

[Freddino18]

You get a sonar system

I insert gay sex for Jesus

[phillip1882]

you get in trouble with priests

i insert monty pythons holy grail

[Freddino18]

You get a beacon

I insert a Danimals Crush Cup

[Sean Quixote]

You get pudding splashed on your face.

I insert resentment.

[phillip1882]

you get revenge

i insert love

[Freddino18]

You get a song

I insert lubricant

[phillip1882]

you get a well oiled machine

i insert a car

[Freddino18]

You get a boatmobile

I insert a bat mobile

[Sean Quixote]

You get a stalagmite of guano.

I put ancient ruins in the vending machine.

[phillip1882]

you get historical knowledge

[Sean Quixote]

You get somethingness.

I put Chekov's gun in the machine.

[somitomi]

You get a deus ex machina

I insert a god

[ratammer]

You get a goddess (me).

I insert a deck of playing cards.

[phillip1882]

you get solitaire

i insert gravity

[ratammer]

You get gravy.

I insert a loophole.

[Sean Quixote]

You get a donut. Or, if you prefer, a torus.

I insert a tautology.

[ratammer]

You get taught an -ology.

I insert a microphone.

[Freddino18]

You get a megaphone

I insert Megatron

[phillip1882]

you get a decepticon

i insert robots

[Sean Quixote]

The machine regurgitates a single small gear, covered in oil.

I insert an obscure reference.

[phillip1882]

you get something rarely known

i insert common sense